A New Title and The Law Abiding Citizen
(upbeat, rhythmic music) (swooshing) It’s a beautiful day, Your Highness. Beautiful day?
Yes. Once you live to see the day, Your Highness, it’s beautiful. Did you call me Your Highness? I want to change your title, sir. You trying to butter me up? Instead of Your Honor, Your Honor, I want to change it to Your Highness. Because you are the King of all the Judges in Rhode Island, that’s my opinion though. When you leave here, you may have an entirely different view of that. Okay, okay, sir.
All right. Number one, Inspector Quinn, his car’s been booted. (Dukoey laughing)
Yeah. Before we even got to that, the number one was that jacket. Yeah, oh,
(Dukoey groaning) I’m sorry, no, it was my daughter’s car, sir. Hold on for a minute. Number one, Inspector Quinn, his car has been booted. So he made a conscious decision, “I’m gonna get up, and I’m gonna butter this judge up so much–” (courtroom laughing) “that you’re gonna give me a break.” So every royal title that he can think of, he just threw at me, right? So far you haven’t struck a chord. No, no, no, no. Anyway, you have three, not one, not two, but three red light violations. You also have five parking tickets. None of these have been paid, and that’s why your motor vehicle was booted. Yes, Your Honor. It is my daughter’s car, she is using it, not me. Oh, your daughter drives the car? Yes, she drives it, not me. How old is your daughter? Uh, she was born, I think about 35, but she travels right now. She is not here, she is in Liberia. Oh, she’s out of town? She’s on the lam, she took off. (Dukoey laughing) She’s in Liberia right now, Your Honor. Yeah?
Yes. Is she on vacation or is she working? (Dukoey sighing) What happened is, the kid that got elected President, he and I play soccer together, so– The new President, called for your, sent for your daughter? Well, I would say yes, because– What did he say, Inspector Quinn? The new President wants his daughter? No, what I’m saying here is, the new President Oppong Weah, we were all kids together. We played soccer together in Liberia. Oh, oh you know people in high places? Yes, your– This guy’s President with the, he’s friendly with the President of Liberia. I’ve been friendly with you also, when you were in the old building over there. What do you call him? I’m gonna tell you something. If you wanna find out how friendly you are with this guy, you should send him a wire right now and tell him that you need about 400 bucks to pay your tickets. (courtroom laughing) You find out how friendly you are with him. That’s a good one, Your Honor, Your Highness. He’ll say to you, “Dukoey, I’m sorry, you’re on your own.” (Dukoey laughing) That’s a good one, Your Highness. Please, do me a favor, don’t call me Your Highness. Oh, okay, may I say something, sir? If you’re gonna give me a title, call me, Your Royal Highness. Oh, okay, great, good! I don’t wanna be just Highness, I wanna look a bit higher. Okay? As I say, Your Royal Highness, I wanted the best in the state of Rhode Island. Oh, I’m gonna have to stop being your Royal Subject? What are you gonna call him? (Dukoey laughing wildly) I don’t know how I’m gonna handle that one. What are you gonna call him? The Deputy Royal Highness. Deputy Royal Highness? I’ll accept the title. (Dukoey laughing) I wanna tell ya, he’s been called a lot other names in this court. Never. Most of which I can’t repeat. Oh dear. So what else do you wanna tell me about this? Other than the fact that you’re throwing your daughter under the bus. So your daughter sent you here, she’s with the President of Liberia? She’s there at the Royal Palace, so she’s got people fanning her, they’re feeding her cocktails and everything else, and here you are. (Dukoey laughing) There’s $300 for the violations and a $100 boot fee, for a total of $400. How much of that can you pay today? I can pay $200, Your Royal Highness. All right, we’ll release the boot when you pay 200, and then the other 200, make sure your daughter gives you the other 200, when’s she getting back? That’s a very good question, Your Royal Highness. I would guess it could be–
No, don’t call me, please. Please, don’t call me Your Royal Highness. I understand you’re trying to be respectful. No, no, no, there are no stamp, but, if– You call me exactly what you think in your head. Your Royal Highness, if I put that to a vote right now Just him, folks, just him
for us to vote on that (courtroom laughing) Everybody here gonna say yes, ~because you are one of the, I’m not because I want a favor from you, Your Royal Highness. But you are one of the best in the state of Rhode Island. You see that? That’s it, ya see. Now I got you smiling, Your Royal Highness. Work out a payment plan with Alyssa, okay? Work out a payment plan with her. We’ll release the boot today. Thank you very, very kindly today, Your Royal Highness! Okay, please accept my title, please, please, please? We wish you well, we wish your daughter well, we hope everything goes fine there in Liberia. And I hope your friend the President, Oh yeah.
invites you, Oh.
to the Royal Palace, and treats you royally. And we would all be happy for you. Good luck. And, Your Royal Highness, you still look good believe it or not. The last time we met was 1987. I look terrible.
The old building. Oh, you’re a repeat offender? Oh no, not me, parking ticket. I’m 72, Your Royal Highness, so I mean you look good! Anyway, I zip it. Thank you. Inspector Quinn, or His Deputy Royal Highness? It’s a toss-up, I love ’em both. How ’bout a combination? His Royal Deputy Inspector Quinn. I like it. Bureaucratic, yet regal. Much like me. Done. Mr. Mafuchi, you have four red light violations. Yes, I’d like to fight them all. I’d like to fight, in particularly– Well, wait a minute. Violation Number 16 40 96 47. Oh, we’ll get all of them. Mr. Mafuchi wants to fight these tickets. Okay, we’re gonna take 463 first. The light is yellow, it’s red. He was the 2nd car through? It’s this car here, Judge, I’ll stop when the light’s on red. Okay. We’re gonna stop it when it’s on red. The light is yellow, red. Yes, but– Just, just stop. It’s this vehicle right here, Judge. All right, it’s that vehicle right there. You see that vehicle? He’s got the arrow on it, look at it. He’s got the arrow on it. Do you see where your car is? yes, Your Honor.
It’s before the crosswalk. It is. The light is red, you’re making a left hand turn. All right, what do you wanna tell me about that? The black vehicle in front of me cut me off, which impaired my vision, and I had to stop– Don’t give me that! The black vehicle, your vision was not impaired young man. I mean, he– Young man, your vehicle, your vision was not impaired. Don’t give me it’s, don’t give me a phony excuse, cause it’s not gonna help you. All right? You don’t have a bus, or a big trailer truck in front of you. You got just a regular car, and you’re in a hurry, and you want to get through the light. It’s very simple. Let it run, Inspector Quinn. There’s no way in the world your vision was impaired by that truck. None. All right, the next one is, in fairness to you, in fairness to you, we’re gonna look at the Pleasant Valley Parkway and Valley Street, because the video was not clear, and the city may not be able to prove its case. So we’re gonna look at it. This is 063? Right, sign right there, it’s no turn on red. But I can’t see it. I can’t see it. And, my position is very clear, that the city must prove its case. The only evidence they have here is a video, and I can’t see the sign in the video. So I’m gonna dismiss that one. Okay, next, is 663, Service Road 7 and Broadway. The light is red already. (courtroom chattering) All right. There are two signs, the signs are visible, you can’t make a right-hand turn unless you stop. But,
Okay. can you give me leniency with that? You want leniency?
Yes. Inspector Quinn, bring his record up. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, 10. You’ve had 10 red light violations on cameras. Let me tell you something young man. When you drive in Providence and you see cameras, they’re there for a reason. But you’re not here for that. So you want leniency, usually we give people leniency because of good conduct, of extenuating circumstances, they have health problems, whatever the case might be. What are your extenuating circumstances why I should give you a break, or leniency, as you put it, when I look at your record and you got 10 violations? Tell me what they are. I’m a law abiding citizen.
What’s that? I’m a law abiding citizen. You’re not a traffic abiding citizen. So what are you’re extenuating circumstances why I should give you a break? I’m just a college kid, making it through this world. You’re a college kid?
Yes. Yeah, and where do you go to college? Johnson & Wales. Yeah, and your parents are paying your tuition. No. Who’s paying your tuition? I am. Where do you work? McCormick and Schmick’s, and I– Where? McCormick and Schmick’s, Downtown Providence. Well you can’t afford to pay college tuition working at McCormick and Schmick’ss. I also have a Real Estate License for the state of Rhode Island.
I beg your pardon? I also have a Real Estate License for the state of Rhode Island. Oh good, so you make a lot of money? I do very well. Good, now you’ve proven to me that you can afford to pay the tickets. (audience laughing) He’s made it easy for us Inspector Quinn. But then, if I have to pay you tickets, then I can’t pay tuition. You’re gonna pay. Okay, it’s $225. Can I fight the parking ticket, too? It’s $225, see Inspector Quinn, he’ll explain the parking ticket to you. If there’s a blueprint for how not to win a case in court, this guy just wrote it. First, he tried to pull a snow job on me by saying that the truck block his vision. Second, he asked for leniency claiming that he was a law abiding citizen, yet, he had 10 red light violations. And then, he felt the need to boast that he made a lot of money, at the same time that he’s asking me to reduce his fine. Three strikes and you’re out, pay the man. All rise and hit subscribe, so you don’t miss the latest viral moments like this one. Share these videos and weigh in on the cases. You be the Judge. Subscribe now!