25 Republican Men Ban Abortion In Alabama


WELCOME, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
TO “THE LATE SHOW.” I’M YOUR HOST, STEPHEN COLBERT.( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
THE CUTE ONE.( LAUGHTER )
BEFORE WE GET STARTED, RIGHT OFF THE BAT, I JUST WANT TO THANK
THE NEWS CYCLE. BECAUSE IT’S A RARE TREAT FOR A
LATE-NIGHT COMEDIAN WHEN THE SUBJECT OF YOUR COMEDY IS
LEGISLATION RESTRICTING ABORTION. IT’S JUST A FUNNY WORD, LIKE
GUACAMOLE. LAUGH BUT THAT’S THE BIG STORY,
SO HERE WE GO. YESTERDAY, ALABAMA LAWMAKERS
PASSED A BILL BANNING NEARLY ALL ABORTIONS. ( AUDIENCE BOOING )
THAT IS EITHER AN OVERREACH BY THE ALABAMA G.O.P. OR SOME
PRETTY INTENSE VIRAL MARKETING FOR THE NEW SEASON OF
“HANDMAID’S TALE. IF A TV SHOW HAS TO BECOME
REALITY, WHY CAN’T IT BE “STAR TREK” SO THEY CAN BEAM ME OFF OF
THIS PLANET.( APPLAUSE )
UNDER THE ALABAMA BILL, DOCTORS WHO PERFORM, LET’S SAY,
“GUACAMOLES,” WOULD FACE FELONY JAIL TIME UP TO 99 YEARS, IF
CONVICTED. YEP. THEY’RE GOING TO THROW THEM
RIGHT IN THE ALABAMA SLAMMER FOR 99 YEARS. LET’S SEE, IT’S 2019, SO BY
THE TIME THOSE DOCTORS GET OUT OF JAIL, IN ALABAMA, IT WILL BE
1895.( LAUGHTER )
( APPLAUSE )
THE BILL ALSO–INE 61? I’M NOT SURE. THE BILL ALSO MAKES NO
EXCEPTIONS FOR VICTIMS OF RAPE AND INCEST, BECAUSE THE WHOLE
POINT OF THIS LAW IS TO ESTABLISH THAT A FETUS IS A
PERSON WITH RIGHTS. NOW, THAT IS A BOLD
INTERPRETATION OF HUMAN DEVELOPMENT. BUT, ON THE PLUS SIDE,
APPARENTLY, PREGNANT WOMEN GET TO VOTE TWICE NOW.( APPLAUSE )
( APPLAUSE )
IT IS THE MOST– IT IS– I THINK
IT’S FAIR TO SAY THAT THIS IS THE MOST RESTRICTIVE LAW OF ITS
KIND IN AMERICA. WHICH IS WHY IT BARELY SQUEAKED
BY IN THE ALABAMA SENATE, WITH 25-6, WITH ALL 25 VOTES CAST IN
FAVOR COMING FROM REPUBLICAN MEN. THOUGH IT MAY BE THE LAST TIME
THOSE REPUBLICAN MEN WILL BE COMING FOR A WHILE.( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
THAT’S THE ONE. IT’S A BETTER JOKE. ALABAMA IS JUST THE LATEST OF
THESE RESTRICTIVE LAWS. THEY’RE ALL OVER THE PLACE RIGHT
NOW. THEY’RE FOLLOWING MISSISSIPPI,
OHIO, AND GEORGIA, WHERE, EVEN IF A GEORGIA RESIDENT PLANS TO
TRAVEL ELSEWHERE TO OBTAIN AN ABORTION, WHEN SHE COMES BACK,
SHE COULD FACE 10 YEARS’ IMPRISONMENT. NOW WE KNOW– NOW WE KNOW WHY
SHE WAS TAKING A MIDNIGHT TRAIN TO GEORGIA. SHE WAS SNEAKING PAST THE COPS. NOW, HOWEVER YOU FEEL ABOUT
ABORTION– AND IT’S A VERY DIVISIVE ISSUE. REASONABLE PEOPLE CAN HAVE
DIFFERENT OPINIONS. AND THE PEOPLE OF ALABAMA VOTED
FOR THESE LEGISLATORS– BUT EVEN THE LEGISLATORS ADMIT THIS LAW
IS NOT DRAFTED SINCERELY. IT’S A PURPOSEFUL AND CYNICAL
OVER-REACH BECAUSE THEY JUST WANT TO USE IT TO GET TO THE
SUPREME COURT AND OVERTURN “ROE V. WADE.” OF COURSE, PEOPLE HAVE BEEN
TRYING TO DO THAT FOR DECADES. WHAT’S DIFFERENT ABOUT THIS
SUPREME COURT?>>ANTHONY KENNEDY, WHO WAS A
VOTE FOR “ROE V. WADE,” HAS BEEN REPLACED BY BRETT KAVANAUGH, WHO
WILL VOTE TO OVERTURN IT.>>Stephen: SO, THIS ALABAMA
CASE COULD OVERTURN “ROE V. WADE,” AS LONG AS IT DOESN’T
ARRIVE AT THE SUPREME COURT DURING BEACH WEEK.( LAUGHTER )
( APPLAUSE )
OBVIOUSLY, THEN– OBVIOUSLY,
WHEN KAVANAUGH WILL REFUSE HIMSELF, WHICH IS THE LEGAL TERM
FOR BOOFING. “DUDE! DUDE, YOU WERE A MONSTER! DUDE, YOU WERE A MONSTERT PARTY
LAST NIGHT. YOU RECUSED YOURSELF! I WOULD HAVE HELPED.” THE BILL’S PROPONENTS ARE VERY
CONFIDENT ABOUT ITS CHANCES IN THE COURT, ESPECIALLY ALABAMA
PRO-LIFE COALITION PRESIDENT AND COLONEL SANDERS AFTER HE GOT HIS
STOMACH STAPLED, ERIC JOHNSTON.>>Stephen: SO HE’S PRO-LIFE,
UNLESS IT’S RUTH BADER GINSBURG. QUICK, JUSTICE GINSBERG, GET
PREGNANT! IT’S YOUR ONLY CHANCE!( LAUGHTER )
NOW, NOW, THE LACK–( APPLAUSE )
THE LACK OF EXCEPTIONS IN THE BILL HAS TROUBLED MANY, EVEN
THOSE WHO VOTED FOR IT, BUT THAT SHOULDN’T BE A PROBLEM,
ACCORDING TO THE BILL’S SPONSOR, REPUBLICAN STATE SENATOR AND
UNDERTAKER’S FIRST PASS AT GIVING YOUR LOVED ONE A SMILE,
CLYDE CHAMBLISS. CHAMBLISS EXPLAINED THAT THE
BILL DOESN’T ACTUALLY OUTLAW ABORTION, SAYING IT ONLY
AFFECTS WOMEN WHO ARE “KNOWN TO BE PREGNANT” AND WOULD PROVIDE
“EVERY FEMALE THAT’S PREGNANT OR THINKS THEY’RE PREGNANT, AND THE
MALE WHO WAS INVOLVED, IT GIVES THEM THAT WINDOW OF TIME. THIS BILL DOES NOT CHANGE THAT
WINDOW OF TIME.” SO, IF YOU FIND OUT YOU’RE
PREGNANT, THE LAW GIVES YOU ALL THE TIME BEFORE YOU KNEW THAT
TO DECIDE WHAT YOU WANT TO HAVE DONE. THAT IS A GREAT OUT FOR ANY
WOMAN WHOSE OB/GYN IS DOC BROWN.( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
IF THAT SOUNDS LIKE CLYDE CHAMBLISS HAS NO IDEA HOW BODIES
WORK, WAIT UNTIL YOU HEAR HIM EXPLAIN HOW A WOMAN FINDS OUT IF
SHE’S PREGNANT. “SHE HAS TO TAKE A PREGNANCY
TEST. SHE HAS TO DO SOMETHING TO KNOW
WHETHER SHE’S PREGNANT OR NOT. YOU CAN’T KNOW THAT IMMEDIATELY. IT TAKES SOME TIME FOR ALL THOSE
CHROMOSOMES, AND ALL THAT.” YES, WELL SAID. WHO AMONG US DOESN’T REMEMBER
SITTING IN HEALTH CLASS AND LEARNING ABOUT “THE BIRDS, AND
ALL THOSE CHROMOSOMES, AND ALL THAT.” I’M STARTING TO SUSPECT
ALABAMA, SEX ED IS JUST TAUGHT BY SOME GUY NAMED ED. SO FAR, ONE DEMOCRATIC WOMEN
TRIED TO FIGHT BACK. STATE SENATOR VIVIAN FIGURES
INTRODUCED AN AMENDMENT “TO MAKE VASECTOMIES A FELONY, NOTING
THAT THERE ARE NO LAWS REGULATING WHAT A MAN CAN DO
WITH HIS BODY.”( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
OH! OH, SNAP.( LAUGHTER )
I MEAN, SNIP.( LAUGHTER )

Author Since: Mar 11, 2019

  1. If you kill a pregnant women it’s double homicide but if you kill the baby (abortion) it’s fine………something doesn’t add up

  2. Hey, you know, if women just sleep with other women from now on, that's a guaranteed pregnancy prevention!!!

  3. I’m disappointed that he professes to be Catholic and puts out something like this

    “‘The Amen, the faithful and true witness, the source of God’s creation, says this:
    “I know your works; I know that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either cold or hot.
    So, because you are lukewarm, neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of my mouth.”- Revelation 3:14-16

  4. It makes no sense to me that the US political parties appoint judges. What the fuck is the reasoning behind that!? Doesn’t work like that in the U.K.. you have to be qualified, studied further, be tested and interviewed by other judges etc. No political party can appoint someone, it’s getting a job promotion essentially. Politics and the law are very different things and the American system just makes no goddamn sense!

  5. Does that mean Alabama expects women to take a weekly a monthly abortion pill? So we can get one before we know we are pregnant??

  6. Simple, if these women want autonomy with their bodies dont effen keep voting these guys in. Dont tell me there are more men than women in these red states. RED states how appropriate.

  7. How is this even a segment? What has the world come too where there is no issue making fun of the banning of killing babie? You people need help. Like serious help.

  8. People trying to save earth by not polluting
    Pro birth people: Let's ban abortion and humans will get over populated and we are all going to die. Fun
    These pro birth people out here fighting for a clump flesh that isn't even alive and at the same time earth is becoming over populated. You stubid stubid people.
    non living cells or all the people on earth that are already living?

  9. Did any women VOTE for the men whose votes were cast so as not to cost said men defeat in the next election?

  10. Clearly we need to make it so all abortions are done with guns. Otherwise abortion will never be legal.

  11. Of God America you have to much idiots on m^2 try mouse poison maybe you have a chance to be free of them. I bet this men force themselves on a woman at last once in their lives and I bet if they came in Europe with this attitude they will be death in 12 hours, we don't play with the human rats we decapitated them 👹

  12. With respect to your closing joke. There are no laws against getting your tubes tied. A vasectomy is a false equivalency.

  13. Abortions kill a lot of babies from the poor and minority communities. That's why liberals so vehemently support it. They also love the racist and euginicist founder of Planned Parenthood, Margret Sanger.

  14. Abortion and guns are both not rights. They are fixation that americans hold dearly and only americans. Most of the world do not fucking care if you have strict anti-abortion laws or and strict anti-gun laws, if anything, these 2 should have heavy restrictions though I agree not ban but improvement of life. So the comment section here has both the pro-abortion rights arguing the same way against the pro-gun rights back and fourth and both are wrong. There, now you can all hate me.

  15. There are many, many instances when the government tells men what they can do with their body. The military tells men their body can't grow hair longer than 2 inches. Schools tell boys their body can't grow hair longer than a certain length. The government tells men their body will sign a draft registration form and update every time they move. The government tells men they will subsidize social security, medicare, and health insurance for women with the efforts of their body, but doesn't tell women they will subsidize auto and life insurance for men (even though women require men provide transportation on Friday and Saturday nights when accidents are worse). Bottom line though, at some point the fetus becomes a baby due to higher brain function and it becomes murder to end its life for convenience.

  16. 4:34 No, you idiot. He mentions RBG to make the point that she might not be on the court if it came up for a vote, and that might give the chance of overturning roe a better chance, given her liberal position on this issue.

  17. Who are men to judge when they haven't walked an inch in the shoes of a female victim of rape or incest? When did a man ever become pregnant because of these reasons?

  18. "Beam me off this planet" because there aren't other countries in the world without this fuckedup government? Very America centric

  19. The only law restricting womens rights to abortion that I wouldn't be mad at is if that law says- those who have consensual sex in which a pregnancy occurs then those involved should take responsibility and not be allowed an abortion. And yes, I know those are most of the women getting abortions.
    The lower percentage of women getting abortions are Rape & incest victims. Rape, incest & health of the mother should ALWAYS be exceptions for abortion. A child should never be forced to give birth, a rape victim should never be forced to give birth to the baby of her attackers and the health of the mother(a living human being) will always be more important than a fetus with no working brain. End of story. If you reject any scientific facts about the state a bundle of cells inside a females womb then you're probably an old, white, religious, Republican, male that only thinks about his own interests ii

  20. Imagin getting rape by DONALD TRUMP OR MITCH MCCONNELL, ENDS UP PREGNANT…. and have to birth this child. Omg

  21. The lawless party of war death and destruction, the party of no healthcare, the party of profit and FAKE christianity saying they are pro-life? talk about FAKE news! Rethuglicans need to put another enema of radioactive fluids up their asses and get on with it. I hope you all die horrible disfiguring painful lingering death and wish you had been aborted because you all are abortions on 2 feet… You are all scientifically proven that you are all braindead and simply walking zombies with warm tissue. “Brains” already aborted in first trimester of your mother’s Illegitimate pregnancy… You inbred monsters!

  22. What about if a pro-lifer Is determined to have a cancerous tumor which can be removed… But, SOMEBODY HAS BELIEFS that it should not be removed as it is part of a living organism? Shall we leave the tumor in you? It’s not your decision, it belongs to our religious beliefs And we say the tumor should remain in you which could debilitate and cripple you after a great deal of pain, but it is our “god’s plan” and not for you to decide. Do you love it!?

  23. I'm pro-life. But I'm kind of disgusted with how Republicans are treating women, sexual abuse, people of color, wars, etc. Pro-life isn't supposed to be a stance you take for votes or for money. It's a stance you take when you actually care about life and people, which includes after birth.

  24. While I agree with the vasectomy thing to use a bargaining chip i dont agree that "there are no laws governing what a man can do with his body" because there are. you cant have sex with a child and you cant rape anyone.

  25. strategy of the left- keep Trump and Republicans on the media all the time. Doesn't matter why, just keep talking about them so that people think they are always doing the wrong thing.

  26. No. Pregnant women don't get to vote twice, moron. You have to be eighteen to vote. A fetus is a human being but does not get to vote.

  27. There's nothing that a man can do with his body that results in the death of a human being, you feminazi harpies. It's apples and oranges. Furthermore, vasectomies prevent pregnancy and therefore prevent abortion.

  28. Some people hate abortion and that's fine, because choice
    They have the choice to dislike that, they have the choice to call it murder. But it's a choice. EVERYONE SHOULD BE ENTITLED TO A CHOICE. If you disagree with it, fine. But don't try and take away another's choice. It upsets me to think people are trying to take away people's choice, OVER THEIR GODDAMM BODIES. you don't have to have an abortion, you can keep that child. Just don't try and spread your ideas on to others. As long as your choice doesn't affect a living person negatively (a fetus isn't a person, but you have a CHOICE to disagree with me)
    You don't have to have an abortion. If you want the fetus then keep it. If you don't want it, you have the CHOICE to remove it from your body.
    Jeez this is long. But I have a lot to say. Choice. Don't try and take away other peoples

  29. here is me replying to several arguments against abortion
    1) the women should just not have sex if she's not open to the possibility of a fetus growing within her womb.
    – by all means, if you don't want kids use protection. Be safe. BUT no protection is 100% effective, so still could lead to pregnancy. Also, sex is a part of marriage/relationships and life. You shouldn't be denied it just because you don't want kids.
    2) the woman could just have the baby and give it up for adoption.
    – the adoption system in a lot of countries is full, underfunded and many kids have an awful time there. Forcing all the women to have the babies then putting into the care system would out a serious financial strain on what is already a poor system. Also, that's still making a women go through nine months of her body changing and growing, just so she can give it up. She still has to have that painful labour. Also, it could be a danger to life, pro life people, do you want loads of unhappy lives, yes there will be lots of happy lives as well, but also loads of unhappy lives as well. Or do you want less lives, but maybe they are more happy.
    3) fetus rights. Its murder. MURDER.
    – (JUST LOOK AT THE COMMENTS, YOU WILL FIND A REPLY TO THIS SOMEWHERE. IM TIRED AND THIS IS TOO LONG ITS KILLING MY PHONE)

    pro anti choice. Abortion will happen whether it's legal or not, but it will just kill more women. Backstreet abortions are dangerous and kill.
    You don't have to agree, just leave people be!!

  30. These 25 men will be remembered for saving the lives of thousands of Black babies. What a bunch of racists they are in Alabama. 😆

  31. If Alabama wants more babies, We all know of some little children being held on the southern border who would love to come there.

  32. Comparing abortion to a vasectomy is a pretty weak argument, unless a vasectomy rips a conceived human out of another human after they neglected to be responsible by using a condom.

    Prochoice answer this: if a pregnant woman is attacked and loses the baby because of the attack, should her attacker be charged with murder? If no, youre heartless and i have nothing else to say to you. If yes, then you value all life and i am glad you have moral standards. If you say it depends on whether or not the woman was going to get an abortion, then youre also saying that the fetus has a conditional value that the mother decides for it, which is pretty fucked up.

  33. WONDERFUL IDEA! MAKE VASCECTOMIES ILLEGAL FOR MEN WHO HAVE PREGNANT RELATIVES OR FRIENDS!!! IT PERFECT.

  34. Okay so they gunna ban abortion what if you where raped and you didn’t want to live with that your whole life (that meaning the rape) and you can’t abort now 🤷‍♀️🤦‍♀️

  35. Women on men in abortion. Women : no uterus no opinion. Alrighty then when it comes to manspreading no testicles no opinion

  36. He reminds me of RDJ. Great person, funny, care about people's human rights, they look similar to me too

  37. You mean murderers can’t kill defenseless babies 👶 the injustice! Responsible women who don’t want kids make him put on a condom or don’t have sex.And stop saying the rape stuff,rape is so small a percentage in abortions it sad. Right is Right and Wrong is Wrong

  38. Rather than make vasectomies a felony, make them mandatory reversible only if the male has a woman's consent to procreate.

  39. I can hardly believe this. Every single woman in Alabama should be on the streets protesting this barbaric law.

  40. I'm a molecular biologist and just want everyone to be aware that chromosomes are simply the very long strands of continuous DNA that our total genetic material is sub-divided into. Human cells have them. But so do all animals and even yeast (single-celled fungi). They are as broad and general a subject to biology as water is to oceanography.
    Dude just threw out a very general "sciency" term ("chromosomes"), either ignorantly dismissive of biology, or pretending to be semi-well-educated. Respect the science, and if you don't know sh*t, don't pretend to, dumbass. Pisses off scientists like me.

  41. America is all about freedom however then they get rid of the right for women to do whatever they see best with the pregnancy and their bodies.

  42. And here I am just waiting for the mandatory blood, bone marrow, and organ donation bills… in defense of life of course.

    Still waiting

  43. Good job Alabama for making murder of babies illegal!! I am sorry that some people disagree cause they want to kill their babies

  44. 7 out of 9 men legalized abortion and chose to disregard the explicit right of life in favor of obscure, implied "rights" within the constitution.

    Also, political comedy shows are humorless by default. No talent needed, just a POV and an audience with the same POV. No I didn't watch this cuz Colbert ain't funny.

  45. 6:39 Bit of a reach there. A vasectomy does not kill off sperm or anything, so in no way are potential lives taken.
    Also a vasectomy is for preventing pregnancy, not terminating a growing lifeform.

    So, no. The reason there aren't rules to tell men what they can/can't do to their body, is not because of feminism. There simply is no equivalent in men.

    So we should just cut off any mans dick if they rape or commit incest. 😀 Seriously. Make them suffer more than any prison would, and take away their joy in life. Make sure to leave enough of the testicles for them to still have a sex drive, but unable to sate it. Though this might be considered torture, I think we all agree that they deserve it.

Related Post